It Doesn't Have To Be Monday Blues

Ahhhhh writers block! What's a lady to do? I mean, here it is that I started this blog and know that readership increases when a schedule is in order and people start expecting to see a new blog post every Tuesday , Wednesday and well whenever else. Needless to say, I didn't want to force anything but here I am, seemingly over the hump for now. 

Yes, schedules and predictably serves its purpose, however, isn't it nice to expect the unexpected too?

I mean maybe it's nice to get a blog post today telling you to not roll your eyes and grumble that it's Monday and you don't feel like getting out of bed, but instead to thank God you have feet to get out of bed, you opened your beautiful eyes this morning and you have a job to go.

Often times, I'm speaking to my self first in posts such as this.

I have been learning to give it my best in every situation all the while never losing sight of the bigger picture and what I want the end result to be.

So if something doesn't go the way you want it to today, step back, walk away,  breathe, tell yourself, you are great and then get back to the task at hand.

Give it your best this Monday and the next day and then the next and then...

Happy Monday! 

Appreciate Kindness By Being Kind Too

It feels great to give or at least it should!
I think that I've always been a kind person. It's innate and I'm thankful for that.
It is also at times a conscious decision to be kind and it's really because, I think we are here to not only help ourselves, but to help others when we are in a position to help.
With that being said, don't be the person who keeps taking from someone kind and never giving; kind and idiot are not synonymous. I'm kind, but I'm not fool and I'm no weakling.

It is important to note that we are in a society and system that is mostly self serving. Why then would anyone try to abuse someone's kindness? Doesn't everyone like the feeling of receiving something good?- a hug, words of advice, money, a ride home etc.
My thinking is that if I know how good it feels to receive, let me then give to someone else, so then can have that good feeling too.

I've noticed that there are some who appreciate my kindness truly and there are some who just take take and take some more.
You must understand that I'm a very in tune person. I know who you are. The thing is I know that what I put out in the universe is ultimately what I will receive whether in this life or the next!

With that being said, even the kindest person will turn away from giving to you if  all you do is take and never give back when you are in a postion to give.
Besides to show kindness is to show love...

“The great acts of love are done by those who are habitually performing small acts of kindness.”
Victor Hugo

There Is Power In Our Voices

Every time a black person gets vocal or takes action against racism or encourages us to rebel against a system that is not for us and yet we surprise them by standing, refusing to stay down, the same people who created racism try to say we are racist or reverse racism; which is certainly not a thing, but, I challenge you to look at the definition of racism as defined in the dictionary and tell me how a black person can be such.

You must understand that when we say rise up against the system, we are putting ourselves on the front lines, visible, hence a risk to our own lives. It is often times brave to stand because it's easier to sit in this system and silence is golden, so it can be bought and many will sell it for the right price! 

There is power in my voice. There is power in your voice! There is power in our voices. 

He Loves Her In Private, She Loves Him Out Loud

 In her desperation to prove a point, she ran to a love that's more accepted simply based on gender roles.

She passed up on the one who wanted her to see that's she's a queen and not a bitch, a bad bitch.

She ran to a cheater, dealer, who calls women bitches and hoes but ,it's ok if she's his bitch even though, several others seem to claim that same title with him.
 She will keep giving him chances because she loves him and he's a man and men will be men, so it hurts to know he messes with other women but she loves him.

He's a man so her  family and friends will accept him. It's the societal norm... she won't ever have to question her sexuality with him and she won't have to explain anything to them.

Yea he's a cheater and a dealer but the sex is good. The sex is good. He's a bad boy, but she sees good in him. She will be the one to change him.

Plus, in a ways she knows she's paying for past sins, messing with other men before him who she knew were in relationships and such..

He doesn't celebrate her. He hides her. She brags about him. She cooks for him. She'll do anything for him. He hides her. She loves him. He plays her. She loves him. He sexes her. He loves her in private. She loves him out loud. He hides her.

It's not that he's private; it's that there's other women. He lies to her but she loves him....even though...

The Wolf Doesn't Always Come In Sheep Clothing

As a matter of fact, sometimes a wolf is bold enough to be just what it is, a wolf!

Maya Angelou said, "when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time"

Let me say, everyone makes mistakes and we have all done things that we have been less than proud of?

The question is, are we continuing to do those things?

Did we learn from them?

Are we striving to be better everyday?

Ok now let get back to why I'm writing this particular blog piece.

Ah yes, people will show you who they are, simply pay attention.

I had someone once say to me, lately she's been going towards the things and people that she know is bad for her.

This is someone who would be considered a peer in some ways.

Okay, so it seems I'm judging a bit, maybe, but it's really pointing out an observation .

So if you decide to go for the guy who refers to women as bitches and hoes and refers to you as his bitch, does that come across someone who respects women?

If you go for the guy in his 30s whose only source of income is selling drugs, does that seem promising?

If you fall for the guy who posts about having side chicks and cheating, does that seem promising!

This person has boldly shown you who they are, so maybe deep down inside, you want to be hurt.

Perhaps you don't think you deserve to be treated like a Queen and not a "bad bitch"

No sympathy! It sounds harsh.

I've fallen for the wolf in sheep clothing!

The sweet talking lover.

The hold the door open for you lover.

The poem writing lover.

The I cooked dinner for you lover.

The I promise you forever lover.

These days, most people seem to pretend to be what they are not.

I'm being skeptical? Maybe? My experience is telling me that I'm not so far fetched in my thinking.

Prove me wrong, I wouldn't mind being wrong in this case.

So when someone shows you who they are.... 

What are you going to do with that information? 

Purpose

None of us know how long we are here, but I think the best way to live while here is with purpose! Live with purpose. 

I want to be head over heels with someone who is head over heels for me just one more time.

It's why I've been taking so long to be in another relationship.

I've been chased and I've chased, but was the purpose?

What's the difference between persistence and chase?

It's a very thin line, but,  I'm persistent for my dreams.  I have decided that I shouldn't chase my dreams, because they are not running away from me.

I just need to work hard and never stop and I'll reach them because they are there to be reached.

I write and sing with purpose. 

The purpose for my writing and singing is to show that there can be triumph in spite of...

You can be yourself in spite of..

My connections are anything but meaningless therefore, I am picky.

I am not self centered, but as giving as I am, it makes me protective of my spirit.  Therefore, friends and lovers cannot be just anyone.

This for me begins and ends with purpose! 

I care. Yes, I care.

It is not a weakness to show that we care, that I care.

Sometimes I wonder if we have become a society that's less and less compassionate!

My willingness to show it has made me weak to some, when in fact I am anything but.

It has made me a target to some, yet still, genuine people embrace that quality of mine.

If an elderly person is bringing a heavy weight up the stairs, it doesn't hurt to help right?

If someone holds the door open for you, a thank is nice right?

To be considerate of someone is to care for them.

If your employee goes above and beyond in his/her role, telling them and paying according shows care right?

I consider it a beautiful thing when someone reaches to see how I'm doing!

If you are in tune, you should be able to discern when it's coming from the heart. 

It's a shame when people ridicule for you for caring about someone or them. Is that where we are at in society? I'm not a full on skeptic but I am a realist. I will never ridicule someone for caring about me because really it's a blessing to have people around in any capacity who truly care! And there's no time frame when you should stop caring about someone, if you care, you care! 

Let's care more about ourselves, yes, but each other.

Oscars got us talking

I don't understand whites or blacks for that matter who say black people like to play the race card!! Are you joking? This system was built off of oppressing blacks. This country was built off of our backs! So miss me with the bs.

It's just that a lot black have found a way to succeed in spite of.

We have always been strong.

Please,make no mistake, this system never was set up with us in mind. I still want restitution! And yes, I'm going up watch in hopes that Chris Rock makes folks damn uncomfortable! 

The Dark Skin Black Woman

The black woman. The dark skin black woman.

You see, in our society that is a distinction that hardly works in favor of those my complexion.

This is a topic that I have no choice to address because it's one that's definitely discussed in the press, among friends, school children and seemingly every where else.

I wish it wasn't one that I had to write about in this way.

After all, I love my dark skin. My mom taught me to love it and that stuck with me. It stuck with me even though images and voices have bombarded me and tried to convince me otherwise. 

One only need to pay attention to our representation in the media. So few who look like me on TV, but we do have Viola Davis, so I'd better shut up and be thankful.

Then again, you may have heard her acceptance speech in which she noted the lack of roles for "us"

It's a touchy subject but why run away from it or pretend it doesn't exist?

I am the very topic.

Where should I even begin? Hell, I'll just begin because in this case, it doesn't matter where the story begins.

This is one of the few topics that makes me as vulnerable as I can ever be.

"Burnt Hamburger" inspired me to write the words, "first I was tempted to hate my blackeness was in a Brooklyn middle school for my verse in the track, Hello Brooklyn. 

"You're so black"

"Black Bitch"

Yea and those words didn't only come from those another race than me.

To Be Continued...

Believe In You!

People will sometimes ridicule you when they don't understand the moves you make, but it's not for everyone to understand.

There is simply no point in trying to please everyone. It's as impossible as getting a new born fresh out the womb to start walking and talking.

It's an interesting thing though when you're aware of the people rooting for you to succeed and those plotting for you not to and those pretending that they want to.

It is worth noting, that someone in tune with energy can sense all three.

I know. I know who you are. I know which one you are.

At the end of the day, it starts and ends with belief in self.

There is an indescribable inner strength that one must have in order to go against the grain; the status quo.

Life taught very early on about inner strength and it will never go away!

I'm going for it. I'm going for these dreams. 

Say What You Need To Say

If you're familiar with John Mayer's music, yes the title of this blog is directly inspired by that his song, "Say What You Need To Say"

Some say time is relative, but as I get older, I realize just how important it is to say what is on my mind; particularly when it comes to matters of the heart.
Why should I keep it all to myself? ...after all, this isn't a political matter.
Why should I not say I care when I care?
What's wrong with being vulnerable?

Perhaps the answer to all of those questions is fear. Fear can paralyze, thus preventing someone or something from reaching it's full potential.

It's not easy to "say what you need to say" if you are standing up against a person of power or a system that wants to silence you on certain matters.
However, there is great power that comes with using your voice! Let your voice be heard.

This blog though, is more about feelings as it relates to love or caring deeply for someone.

For some, it's easier to care but pretend not to because if you care too much, you may get hurt.
So what happens when two people are unafraid to say they care about each other. What's the point of loving someone and not saying it?
What happens when someone hurts you unknowingly and you don't let them know you are hurting? resentment? anger? confusion from the unknowing party?

I will always say it when it comes to matters of the heart.


Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say
Say what you need to say

Have no fear for givin' in
Have no fear for givin' over
You better know that in the end
It's better to say too much
Than to never to say what you need to say again

John Mayer - Say What You Need To Say

What's That About Revenge?

I suppose I don't understand revenge.

I understand being angry at someone because he/she has hurt or betrayed you in some way.

We've all been on the giving and receiving end of hurt.

However, I find seeking revenge pointless because the laws of the universe ensures that one eventually gets what he/she gives.

I have certainly questioned the timing of karma, but having been on the good and bad side of karma, I know it exists.

Happy New Day

Welcome to 2016, the start of  a new year has arrived.
I want to wish everyone who is working hard to achieve their dreams much success. I hope you will achieve them sooner than later.
As for me, I'm wondering if I should stay here in the tri-state or make a move.
Is the New York scene for me at this moment in time? Am I the only one who can answer that.?

I have my family here, but this music dream is one that I'm chasing alone.
At one time, I found love here but lately all I feel is despair.
I suppose I will feel that as long as I'm sitting in a 9 to 5 chair.
I would have been better off there where I walked away from, but only because you were there.
It turns out you didn't care.
Pardon me for being honest, because after all, it's not just the start of a new year, but it's happy new year.
It's perhaps you wishing that it turns out to be a happy one or being presumptuous enough to say "happy" when one may be feeling anything but...

It's all a state of mind.
We control our happiness right? Everyone has set backs and we cannot allow them to overtake us.
Everything is temporary, so it will be never stay up and it will never stay down. My advice to myself is to take it all in stride. What are your goals for the new year?
I want to be in a self sustaining business and I'm in the words of India Arie, "ready for love"

Anyway, cheers to us making it to see another day and let's make a conscious effort to make every day the best day it can be.